FOLIO OLIO

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I'm an artist, an educator and I write. I also will gamble on just about anything. And I love my wife. This blog is observations from a funny old man who gets pissed off every once in a while.

Saturday, October 25, 2014

SHORT SATURDAY POST #2148


A little tune to scroll by...
That human beings can do such a thing leaves me in awe.

NEWSY BITS...



Phrasing. Dr. Who?



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This man knows how to do his job...
 That's the old fart who took down the Canadian killer.

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What has been overlooked, is that there are a whole bunch of Hong Kong merchants that are furious with demonstrators for keeping customers away...

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 War spectators again...
A few ISIS fighters were vaporized on top of that hill.

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Sorry this post is sub-standard, but, you know....football.

 Always helpful.

A bear in your deer stand...what do you do now?



I really like clever people...

Move to the city they said. It will be fun they said...


Wait for it.....

Holy fucking shit!



 Did you automatically make some assumptions as to the people who ordered this cake? Be honest. Of course you made assumptions.


 That reminded me of that scene from Monte Python and the Holy Grail....you know the one!

 Fuck it, I'm going to be a male stripper.

 OK?!? 






Wait for it....

Let's take another look at this....

What the hell does this mean?

????

Friday, October 24, 2014

FRIDAY #2147


A couple of clips you may find entertaining...

Ever feel...I don't know.....stupid?
Watch this and you will feel a whole bunch better about yourself.

Was emailed this with a terse: Ask and you will receive...
Thanks noble viewer.

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Brand new trailer for the re-release of 2001: A Space Odyssey... 




A will is a dead giveaway.
Do they sell puppets with no strings attached?
Whiteboards are remarkable.




Coyamito Agate Pseudomorph...


You can never lose a homing pigeon. If your homing pigeon doesn’t come back, what you’ve lost is just a pigeon.




Remember this?

I asked one of my young servers how college was going. She said, "College is easy. It's like riding a bike. Except the bik is on fire and you're on fire and everything is on fire."



Is it blowjob or blow job? I would hate to screw up my thank you cards.


I taught school for 20 years. Kids named Ebola is just a matter of time.
I had kids named Leukemia and Asthma....seriously. 



Cẩm nang du lịch bụi An Giang không thể bỏ lỡ...
I can only assume there is a guacamole joke in there somewhere.

When you think about it, this is a pretty good solution to the problem...
 The problem, or course, of how do we get to the top.

Difference that one missing ingredient can have in baking a cake...


Wife sent me an email. It said, "Baby, I'm not wearing any underwear." I replied, "Oh, yeah?" and she replied, "Yeah. Because you never put the fucking laundry in the fucking dryer I asked you to 100 times goddamnit!"


How clever...

I learned two important lessons today. I can't remember the first lesson, but the second one is I have to start writing things down.


 HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHHAAAHAHH!

 Basket stars start out with five arms, from which smaller appendages sprout over time. The creatures can re-grow their limbs -- which have small sharp hooks on them to capture prey...

This is what the other-worldly thing looks like alive...
 And here is what it would look like if we did that sort of thing.
Oh, and they can grow back any severed limb.
You're welcome. Happy swimming.


Another server told me, "I'm going to get a B.S. in psychology, which is exactly what it sounds like.


Extreme soccer...

"You want to lob a few stupid rockets at the Jewish pigs?"
"Sure, why not? It can't be as bad as last time."
"Want to dig around in the dump for something to eat?"
"Sure. Then we will poke the monster in the eye again." 

Well.....shit....

Bar conversation I overheard on the way to the bathroom: "So I was talking with my wife about this pimple on my ass...."



For my young friend, Katie...

Before Facebook, think of all the nonsense that just stayed in people's head.



One Of My Very Own...

Anything with raisins would taste better if the raisins were replaced with chocolate chips....for example, a box of raisins.



I'd just like to be rich enough that "philanthropist" is a valid career option.



How many members of the original band can be replaced before it's just an expensive cover band?



My greatest fear in life is that by the year 2069, I won't find it funny.



If you love something, set it free. If it returns, it probably can't pay its student loans.


 ????
 Maybe it's a translation problem.

Actually they sniff out hard drives (no pun intended). They may or may not contain child porn, but if they deny having it, then assumptions are made. 

Hell, I could do that....

 Istanbul, Pejac...

 Nice illusions...
 The man at work...

Picasso had a COMBOVER?!?!?
I am currently reevaluating my admiration for him. 


A Uniquely Designed Umbrella That Uses Origami Principles To Eliminate the Need for Metal Support Spines...


Nothing says I need a drink like waking up in the morning.


I found that very......interesting.

And after his trauma...
And in a related story...
Sometimes the naked guy wins...
Stupidity is always expensive.

HERE'S TO STAYING POSITIVE AND TESTING NEGATIVE.



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