FOLIO OLIO

About Me

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I'm an artist, an educator, Pastafarian and I write. I also will gamble on just about anything. And I like unusual juxtaposition, but I love my wife...and beer. This blog is observations from a funny old man who gets pissed off every once in a while. Oh, and I mispell alot.

Monday, September 26, 2016

MONDAY'S WHO LET THE DOGS OUT #2835

One Of My Very Own…



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http://folioolio.blogspot.com/2015/07/key-packet-tutorial.html




The very idea of Donald getting his hands on the launch codes of the world’s most powerful nuclear arsenal keeps me up at night.


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On October 27, 2015, Four officers from Savannah Chatham Metro PD stop Tyrie Cyler for failure to yield while entering the roadway. This is how fast a simple traffic stop can turn deadly. When an officers says to show your hands, this is why. Tyrie produced a weapon so fast that he was able to get 2 shots off hitting two of the officers within just a second.












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Parenting is fun if you are into things like cooking for people who aren't hungry.

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CAUTION: Many of the following images of dogs would have never made the cut for posting except I was into dogs today...and some of them are reposts for same reason. But I really like dogs.


Turn in your dog card!



I feel your pain little buddy.

A dog who knows what he likes...

I'm friends with many young people who have hair like hers. I love it.

Got a bored dog? Try this...



Dog being careful...



Dog(ish) thing...

Have You Ever Seen a Fox Lick a Window? Me neither.

And my favorite...


Guilty dog desperately seeks forgiveness.


If I were a dog, this would be me...


And here's one for you cat lovers...


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So many years a bartender taught me that most of the time, stereotypes are absolutely true.

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Greek Warrior

Rather intimidating, don't you think? Now imagine that bastard running at you with a full erection!

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I love movies like these...

^Saw (2004)
2 people awake in a room and find they are trapped on a game by a serial killer.


^Circle (2015)
Fifty people are forced to vote and decide who lives and who dies.


^Exam (2009)
Eight people are given a task to complete for a job.

My all-time favorite was The Cube and the other Cube II and III. It was wonderful...if you like to think while watching a movie.

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Let's post some black people doing funny shit...

That is a Bug Zapper.


But don't his pants fit nice.

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THINGS I DIDN'T KNOW...UNTIL NOW...
Romans built holding tanks beside their coastal villas so they could eat fresh fish whenever they wished.

They were at the exact right height to catch an incoming tide, but not let the fish escape.

Forty-eight million years ago, a snake ate a lizard with a bug in its belly, and all three fossilized...

That fossil, recently described in Palaeobiodiversity and Palaeoenvironments, is only the second of its kind ever found, revealing three levels of an ancient food chain nested one inside the other in paleontology’s version of Russian nesting dolls—or its culinary equivalent, a turducken.

Sponge cake artistry...


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Let's play What Happens Next...

A. Somebody gets a stool post up their ass.
B. An ostrich runs by.
C. A display of the luckiest event in several people's lives.
D. A van goes airborne and knocks over the statue.

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Let's post some white people doing stupid shit...
Roman Legions fight against Germanic tribes in the Battle of the Teutoburg Forest. A battle that would change history.

By the year 9 A.D. Rome had been an empire for 36 years and was seeking to expand it's territory. North of its borders along the river Rhine was Germania, a territory rich in resources & populated by "barbarians". Rome sees this territory on its northeast border as a natural extension to their expanding empire and sends three legions, composed of around 20,000 men, under the command of General Varus to conquer it. It would end up becoming a military campaign so disastrous it was said to have driven Emperor Caesar Augustus insane for none of the three legions would ever make it back to Rome alive.

"A Garden of Bones"

Six years would pass before a Roman army would return to the battle site. The scene the soldiers found was horrific. Heaped across the field at Kalkriese lay the whitening bones of dead men and animals, amid fragments of their shattered weapons. In nearby groves they found “barbarous altars” upon which the Germans had sacrificed the legionnaires who surrendered. Human heads were nailed everywhere to trees.

Oh, look, more about empires...


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What we should call masturbating while smoking weed:
A. Masterblazing
B. Highjacking
C. Weedwhacking
D. Disappointing your mother

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C. A display of the luckiest event in several people's lives.

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I'm all for protesting the actions of your government, but if you do this, then you should be charged with attempted murder.


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Let's do some more dark humor...I LIKE dark humor...


Humor so dark, it ll probably get shot by a cop.

"At a comedy club and the comic asked the audience to make sex noises. The guy sitting next to me starts shouting, 'No, Father John, stop!"

And in a similar vein...

Church told flood damage is not covered by insurance due to it being an 'act of God'.
Hahahabananahaha!

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An illusion where you don't see strange stuff, but can't see all 12 back dots at the same time.


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Whenever I'm feeling I'm getting soft, I log in to my wife's Facebook to rekindle my hatred for humanity.

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Shenzen, China

I read a couple of years ago that the largest cities in the world in 2100 haven't even been built yet. I am assuming they will be in China.

One of the most amazing things that I have read about China is that they have more honor students than the US has students. We can only wonder what that bodes.

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In my opinion, one of the (if not THE) greatest machine ever built...


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A young pre-med student worked at my wife's store several years ago. She moved, to of all places, Green Bay, Wisconsin, and you know what happened...


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If I had come upon this (that was actually an unintended hilarious choice of words) I would not have photographed it...

I would have gone out to my truck for my tools and removed it from the wall and taken it home.

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My Russian friends have some shit to deal with also...

And Dmitry Zakharchenko, the deputy head of the Energy Industry Department of the General Administration of Economic Security and Combating the Corruption, also had €2m in cash.
(I wonder why my news feed used US dollars in the pic.)

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Another game of Guess What Happens next...

A. He stops just before running off the bridge.
B. He does run off the bridge.
C. He runs off the bridge with disastrous results.
D. He runs off the bridge and absolutely nothing happens.
E. The driver gets the seat post up his ass.

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Have you ever read the rules for engagement of UN troops?

They are forbidden to use their weapons until they are fired upon. They must...MUST...stand by and watch at the combatants slaughter civilians.

"Oh, we're not 'Security Guards'...we are 'Security Monitors.'"

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Wow! But why would anyone want to do that to their skins?

How about because it's fun. Isn't that reason enough? It's called Hedonism and I'm all for it.

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My favorite comeback to an argumentative asshole is to ask him if he's been smoking weed. They always say no, then I say, "Maybe you ought to."

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D. He runs off the bridge and absolutely nothing happens.

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Many people are required to pass a drug test to get a job, but then other people throw a fit that they have to pass a pee test to get welfare and unemployment benefits. I can only think that the tests given by companies is to reduce their insurance, otherwise why would anybody care what the employee does on the weekend?

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Language humor.

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Okay, what the fuck is this gross ass shit?

Am I allowed to post such gross shit?


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Aerial view of Burning Man taken from the International Space Station.

There must be at least a pound of LSD in that one picture.

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A blue whale's tongue can weigh as much as a whole elephant.

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